I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
