i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
