When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize