New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
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