So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
