Who wears a wallet chain?!
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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