Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
