I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize