But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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