just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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