i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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