Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
