Just fell off a train. Bad.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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