Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
