is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
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