it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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