I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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