i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
