We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Randomize
