I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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