Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
