dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
