Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
