You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
