she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
