I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
being pregnant is like rehab
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
