I CAN MOONWALK!
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
