You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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