I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
