She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
