I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
