She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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