what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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