Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
