we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
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