I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
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