i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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