weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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