you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
