I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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