I'm eating all of the evidence.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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