Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize