exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
