He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
