i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
the room spins SO much faster in panama
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
