never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
