Sponge bath it is.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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