I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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