Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
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