Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize